Second Anniversary

Two years: this is my second anniversary in writing here.

How the F/m blogosphere has grown. At least on Blogspot, one day perhaps I’ll take a closer look at Live Journal and Bondage.com. (Though some of you must be an affluent bunch: it seems as if there are three bathrooms to clean and nobody buys ready to wear clothes.) In 2004 it seemed like there was only aspirant and Lady Myles.

Happily some of you share if not my manner of life kindred fetishes with sadistic partners.

Some blogs have vanished. A few with hints of things gone badly wrong. I fear that for some exploring D/s leads to divorce. But with the caveat that even love can’t create infinite flexibility the best of luck to the men hoping to introduce the women in their lives to power exchange.

I’ve made a few good virtual friends. Mostly women. I can’t say they have much in common: good hearts and strong minds. Within the sphere of BDSM each operates in very distinct and different ways.

My understanding of some things - like chastity play - has been enriched thanks to the words of some of you.

While I don’t think I had any axes to grind there’s no doubt my tolerance has grown. I’d hate to marginalize anyone - except the narrow-minded. The pompous will be with us forever.

On and off I see someone expressing surprise, even discomfort in seeing people write abstractly about BDSM. Despite my regrettably sober tone the exploration of ideas and feelings about sexuality is fun. With a tiny growth in self-understanding as an extra reward.

There are no new D/s desires, unknown sadomasochistic practices. Each of us is taking turns in sharing how we try to fit them into the puzzle of our own lives. A sequence of kinky satoris.

With my beloved Alexandra I’ve been lucky enough to find a partner who grants me fulfillment in divers ways exceeding my imagination. I can’t imagine how it would have worked out with another: each person is a variable in the equation.

Perhaps I’ve pushed this to the point of tedium these past two years: don’t heed the generalizers, beware of the preachers of rules, the sad men who proclaim one true way. As members of a group there are going to be a handful of generally true insights. As individual how our fetishes find expression in our lives will be special to our circumstances.

Joy to all of you in what it is that you do.