Goddess - Mistress - Domina - Miss - Lady

While she can’t part the sea or bring the dead back to life, my submission brings me closer to something divine, something holy, in myself. She becomes something of a middle-man for me to feel that. Even if she preferred to be called something else, I’m sure the word Goddess would slip from my tongue anyway in that emotional state. So I’m 100% with you on that title, especially if the sub means it sincerely.

I would have a huge problem with being addressed as “goddess.” I cannot imagine permitting it; it smacks to me of hubris. As a pagan, it also strikes me as wildly inappropriate.

The term “Mistress” makes me weak in the knees when I am addressed that way. There is no rational explanation for this. It is, in my opinion, a title that a sub earns the right to use; it means nothing until he has, and I object strongly to it being used with me until then. While “Mistress” really works for me as a proper noun/title, it doesn’t reverberate for me when used as an improper noun (e.g. “She is my Mistress.”).

The term Mistress has been cheapened; so has Lady. If you want to get right down to it, historically many honorifics for women have been diluted, due in large part to a history where women just don’t have that much power. “Goddess” brings that back, but it’s a word that I can’t re-use as I’m still using the original meaning. (And I’ve seen some pro-Dommes use it in a manner which I find ridiculous: “Goddess Lisa”? Please.)

In my last relationship, my sub referred to me occasionally as his Owner (sometimes in German—Inhaber), but usually using the Japanese title which would translate as Lady Proprietor. He was a big fan of Japanese and the title is a near homophone of the title I used for him, with a different honorific.

I found it very amusing that I could track the amount of submission he was feeling based on which honorific suffix he used. When he was fairly deep under, the honorific -“sama” is actually close to that used for divinities, based on my very fragmentary knowledge of Japanese.

He did ask if he could call me Lady, which is a title that means very little to me. I found it somewhat touching because it meant something to him; I think it was a courtly thing. We referred occasionally to the favors a knight might carry, and the term ‘ronin’ was bandied about referring to his previous, unowned status.

Being an atheist for me goddess has mostly literary association, e.g., poetry. My preference is partly aesthetics and partly the feelings of worship and humility I feel when everything goes right.

Yeah, most honorifics have been badly diluted. I can’t think of one that I haven’t seen used to death by online dominatrices.

Owner has a great deal of power for me. As with goddess that sense of owner/property is where I’m happiest.

I’m a monoglot sadly. Without even knowing the word the idea of a word that means Lady Proprietor gives me goose bumps. The idea and that it wouldn’t be coarsened by overuse.

My Lady certainly works for me because of the association with courtly love. But in Alexandra’s country it is a term used by heredity celebrities.

As always, thanks.

My domme/mistress/wife have tried various titles over the years, including Godess and Mistress, which we continue to use occasionally. But when I am feeling submissive the most power is still found in her normal given name. Saying “Yes, Jane” (or whatever) and really feeling the deepness of respect and obedience in those two words make the other titles sound to me to be a little bit make-believe or even silly.

jp, I wondered if that might not be the case for many married couples. Thanks.

You are so right! I hate the title Mistress, for the reasons you stated and then some. I am personally uncomfortable with Goddess as well, because it makes me feel like a wannabe deity. The more I think about it, the more I feel as though titles are a bunch of bullshit posturing, at least when used all the time. I think it’s one thing to call each other “Master” and “Slave” while “Scening” (although I hate that word too), but I like to keep my relationships firmly planted in the real world. And in the real world, we already have names.

There is a worldwide reality shortage for sure.

One of the reasons Goddess works for me is I tend to associate it with Keats’ poetry. And the ancient Greco-roman Goddesses may have been deities but they were capricious and far from perfect.

Since I only do with someone I love “scene” doesn’t at all capture the pleasure it brings me. I think we usually call it play. That might seem to trivialize it to some but the joy of play (in many senses) is something that makes the business of being alive worth it all.

One reason honorifics work for us is the clean separation it gives us from the rest of our shared lives.

Richard, can you make an entry to reference poems (Romantic or otherwise) which you find inspiring, regarding your Lady? I love Keats and would be interested to know which ones you were thinking of, that mention Goddesses in the meanings you reference.

I put off replying to this because I hoped to make space to do a better job.

It never even occurred to me that some people might be able to read certain sentiments into La Belle Dame Sans Merci until I saw your comment.

My reference to Keats was misleading. It wasn’t with reference to Goddesses as superior beings but that my context for the word Goddess is mostly literary. And mostly from Keats. Similarly Shakespeare’s Venus and Adonis which for me remains one of the most erotic poems.

What little poetry I’ve managed to fit into my most recent fragmented and often awful years has been scattered Elizabethan lyrics and Wallace Stevens. Though I’ve never managed to make the time to properly focus on him.

I had been used to the “Mistress” honourific but the way you said “Goddess” in your American accent was so cute and in earnest that I don’t think anyone human could have insisted you changed terminology.

Hope you’re doing OK with the current status. Hugs + Kisses xxx

I remember a little over a year ago trying to discreetly let you know how much I’d rather call you Goddess without being pushy about it.

It has been a very long 16 or so months since we first started talking about getting together and learned that each other has D/s desires.

Love You So Much!

Some time ago i came across an article, the name of which escapes me, but it concerned a religion called Kali. The belief of those who practise it is that one way all women will be worshipped as goddesses and all men will be their slaves. The article in question described the intense submission ritual that the slave must undergo in order to be considered worthy of being a slave. Not too sure if the article was merely a work of fiction or if the belief in an eventual submission of man to woman actually exists. Have to admit i find the thought of it quite erotic, though there were sadistic elements which wouldnt appeal to me.

Hindu mythology is very sexist by contemporary Western standards. Though nothing stops people from seeing what they wish in other cultures.