Subordination

There’s a bit of nonsense in that given that I luxuriate in just about anything that implies servitude, being controlled, conquered - you name it. (And I’m ignoring the lovely ardor I find in the phrase “woman worship.”)

I doubt that even the most attentive regular reader has registered my use of the word subordination” a few times of late.

That word came to mind when I was thinking about my personal response to the use of the word “knight” for a submissive man. While I do enjoy thinking of acts of surrender capturing gallantry and chivalry, knight just doesn’t work for me.

Most knights were corrupt bullies who spent their days murdering and robbing people. And much of that early poetry was about coaxing a woman into adultery. Then it was prettified in the 19th century. (Don’t get me wrong: if you enjoy the designation I have no argument - I’m explaining why I’d never use the term.)

I was also thinking of men who’ve written of enjoying being treated as a household servant (often saying butler but those were very senior servants) or waiter. I don’t much fancy either. Though I could the latter if I were more graceful (or it had some special appeal to Alexandra).

Subordination was an important part of English social philosophy in the 18th century. I’m not a scholar and what follows is based on loose and very imperfect recollection of books read long ago.

While many surely thought that accepting subordinate roles based on political and inherited rank was simply accepting the true nature of mankind others took it very differently. They thought of the role of subordination - ranks within society - as a way of eliminating the strife of competing for importance, striving to be top dog.

Deferring to your social superiors and offering polite condescension to your social inferiors was a way for people to interact smoothly. It had nothing to do with your inherent merit as a human being. Or denied the value of individual talent.

It was a guide for correct behavior that allowed for orderliness and eliminated confusion.

So I’ve been toying with the use of the word subordination within terms of both when Alexandra takes power over me at times. And distinct from the pet and slave roles. Not that I’d say it is important: it is fun however to massage these images in your imagination. But might really fit into explorations of power exchange. No way to know until Alexandra is back and in the mood for BDSM play.

And possibly useful for people who would like a word for their D/s interaction but not happy with the options they’ve seen.

I find the term fetching but that may prove a passing hallucination.

Always interested in other folks take on BDSM nomenclature. We don’t have to take it with dire earnestness to enjoy letting the words do more than play about pleasingly in our minds.