Why Do We Need Bondage?

» BDSM, D/s, S&M: Speculations » Bondage

Do you, like me, feel that bondage is something that you need?

Have you ever tried to figure out why being bound seems so crucial to your satisfaction?

I can see pragmatic reasons for wanting to be held helpless with cuffs, collars and chains. Even if you are a masochist there are times when the pain can make you feel that you must fight back.

I know, I know: if you are really submissive you’d never resist, you don’t need bonds. Sorry, I’m a flesh and blood man. Fight or flight - a legacy of evolutionary programming - may take hold.

There’s a night that I treasure for her harshness when for an instant I was afraid I’d do something like get up and take the can from her. Can you imagine a more disastrous occurrence? I was so afraid I might lose control that I forgot about the pain as I willed myself to stay on the floor and take it.

There was the night she pointed out that I was taking whatever she was doing without bondage. That knocked me clean out of my role. Not a moment I’m proud of.

In my boyhood dreams of enslavement I was always bound, usually to trees or a fence. Later I’d try to fantasize about pain without restraints. My pesky internal editor would only allow me to do that if I pictured the dominant as someone physically powerful enough to keep me in my place.

The practical considerations wouldn’t have occurred to me as a lad.

Clearly I hunger to be held helpless, powerless. I want to be inescapably at another’s mercy.

That a boy felt this need sometimes surprises me. I wish I could go back in time and read his mind. Not that my young self would’ve understood his craving. But maybe the more mature me could divine the source.

Why I want confinement may be something I’ll never understand. Thankfully as an adult I’ve found someone who is happy to help me live my dreams.

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Comments

I think it just gives you something to struggle against. Since you don’t dance you need some other excuse to move around and have fun with your body. :)

I just accept your need for bondage as part of your needs. I tend to shy away because I’m not very practical, terrible with knots and the like. But part of me is excited by the idea of exploring it more, of seeing the different types and degrees of struggling it can produce in you.

I can never say enough how lucky I am to have you to help me live some of my dreams.

And how I’ve appreciated little details like leaving the cuffs on.

Being a masocwhore struggling sounds well … you know.

hi, I do alot of self bondage by myself, i go all out with ball gags and blindfolds. I tie myself to my bed sometimes, other times i do mummification, it maikes me feel mastered, and at 16, it helps somehow am I alone, anyone else out their practice self bondage

I have never been spanked but have often been mildly abusive, pinching women at the pool while swimming and the like.

I have long deserved to be spanked either by the woman or by the female lifeguard who makes me wait until the pool closes…

I enjoy being hogtied now, but It is hard to explain this need when confronted by parents as to why i`m tied to my bed at 1 in the morning, nobody understands it

You know how hard it is to explain to mom and dad why your tied to your bed at 1 AM ?? its not pleasent…but it helps me get through my life better than self mutilation

It’s called “submission,” isn’t it? and you do it voluntarily. But you are weak, you lack self-control, you have a need to be restrained so you can fulfill your role as a toy, as an object, as a sacrifice for Her amusement.

So you submit to physical bondage, even beg for it, to show your submissiveness in spite of your weak nature. It’s a way to overcome your “human” nature and let your “sub” side come out.

It’s making the cell or stocks that will imprison you and crafting the cat that will flog you … and thanking Mistress for taking Her valuable time to use you for Her Divine Pleasure.

Your feelings?

Please share your feelings about Why Do We Need Bondage?. Please stick to the topic of the entry. Forthright disagreement is fine as long as it is civil.
My thanks,
Richard


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