Chastity as a Means of Emotional Recovery

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This will explain why I’ve been thinking seriously about a chastity routine for some months.

I’ve been open about my wanking while Alexandra has been away.

In a kind of relationship often given to orgasm control it probably surprises if not shocks some of you. I’m lucky to have someone like Alexandra who understands.

But to be honest given that I love someone my masturbatory habits are unhealthy. Let me give you the background.

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Several years ago I fell deeply in love with a guy. We bought a house and I thought I was headed for a life of romantic bliss. Actually I’d condemned myself to Hell.

He suffered from bipolar disorder and extreme depression. Foolish Richard thought he could make his lover whole. His moods ranged from sullen to enraged. His extravagance kept me on the edge of financial ruin.

He became addicted to a series of drugs. Pain killers almost always. Heroin for a time. Eventually he became a crack addict. I remember the night he’d stroked my cock so he could pick my pocket.

Eventually his mere presence would cause me to shake and become physically ill. Finally came the day that should’ve arrived years earlier when I through him out of my life.

Our sex life deteriorated quickly. Physical love was so infrequent as to seem something I’d read about rather than had known.

Naturally I started wanking. Five times some days. My fantasies became steadily weirder and darker.

I’d become an adult male addicted to impossible fantasies and to the touch of my own hand. My love for Alexandra has reordered my sexual imagination.

Any man who has masturbated too often knows the risk. Only your grip and rhythm can satisfy you.

A few months ago I started smoking pot regularly. When Alexandra returned to the UK my insomnia returned and marijuana abates it nicely. Pot also unlocks my libido. So I’ve returned to masturbating too often and intensely.

So chastity, possibly it will need to be very prolonged, is a chance to free myself, to return to being the man I prefer to be.

I’ve been very lucky to have an old friend become a lover who complements me in so many ways. To heal my heart, sooth my mind so that I can be whole again.

Comments

You open a lot of thoughts here with this comment. I had never thought of it as unhealty, but now I think you may be right.

Good luck with this!

Masturbation doesn’t have to be unhealthy obviously. But I fell into a deep emotional pit. I need to climb out and be the guy I should be for her. And I think this may be a healing step.

Thanks.

I have a feeling you’re making the right choice. I’d never really thought about chastity that much until a while ago when I mentioned I was fantasizing about it for the first time.

Part of me is excited about trying it, which is probably not as strange as I originally thought. I don’t want to say too much about it, other than I think it may really be what you need in so many ways. I want to hesitate when saying something like that but since you have arrived at this conclusion without much prompting from me I think it’s definately worth trying and might even be fun.

I’ve also been thinking about it for selfish reasons, just so you know :)

Now what would I do without your selfishness?

Your feelings?

Please share your feelings about Chastity as a Means of Emotional Recovery. Please stick to the topic of the entry. Forthright disagreement is fine as long as it is civil.
My thanks,
Richard


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