Ideal Slave

Ooooh. What a lovely question. I will answer the others later.

Bright. Articulate. Detail-oriented and attentive.
Well-read; a bit of a romantic. Affectionate. Physically sensitive. (Half the fun of what I do lies in the reactions of the people I do it to.) Capable and willing to tell me when there is a problem. Obedient. Fit and well. (I am very fond of my current pet, but his health issues do occasionally interfere with what we do.) Employed - I can more than pay my own way (and sometimes enjoy being just a bit of a sugar mommy), but life is so much easier when I don’t have to worry about how he’s keeping body and soul together. In the spirit of the above, capable of taking care of himself when I am not there. Able to relax. Capable of surprising me and holding my interest. Willing to suffer for me. Somewhat unconcerned about conformity.

“Somewhat unconcerned about conformity.” - in all close relationships.

“Fit and well.” - in this I’m not really living up to my promises to Alexandra. So hard to do during times of inner turmoil. Not that there’s any excuse even if you are all alone.

I tend to stream submissives into two directions; Masochists who enjoy sensations and submissives who do stuff for me.

Masochists have to have a strong body and be smart enough to endure my attentions without thinking I’m angry at them. That’s about it really. The type of personality doesn’t matter, I just want to hurt it. If my masochist meets any of my submissive/servant qualifications then it’s gravy, at least until I start wishing they were more interested in the sumissive/servant role. Most aren’t. Too long a wait between acts of savagery, I guess.

The other thing I like is having long duration submissives willing to share part of our lives together. We’re going to have to get along, so it’s best if our temperments and philosophies aren’t too dissimilar. They’re going to have to anticipate me, so they’re going to need to be smart. Ideally, I like to learn something from the people I’m with. It’s great if we can find common goals and work towards it together.

So I’ve described someone strong, independent, sensitive, articulate and intelligent. Someone who can take care of themselves and me. It’s tough to control someone like that, but that’s the way I want it. I want consent to be given every day, so no one gets taken for granted. I also want to have to push myself to stay worthy of that consent.

When I first really starting to work on separating fantasy from reality I pretty much had to admit to myself that I’m the sensation kind. While there’s a real desire to please I could never get satisfaction from being, say, a houseboy. (I’m cleaning house today and am hating every moment of it.)

Though in bonding with a life partner who wants a broad range of experiences the distinction no longer applies since my non-D/s side is - well I wouldn’t call it service - strongly oriented toward pleasing and doing for.

I’ve never done this before.I’m young,female,traditional background.Can’t get these fantasies out of my head.Don’t know where they come from.There’s something so erotic about the way a man moans.I heard it by chance,immediately I knew that’s what I’d been waiting for.A man,moaning,begging, pleading for me to let him come.I found stories on the internet.In real life, I don’t know anyone else like me.Is there anyone out there who can tell me what this means? Does this make me dom? Or sub? Or just confused? Thank you.

Tease and denial, male orgasm control, manipulation are probably the most common forms of kinky sex play.

You may be in some way dominant. No reason to fret about a label, at least until you’ve had some experience.

There are plenty of other women like you.

First off, I wish to thank you for such a beautiful site, Richard. I’ve read many of your blogs over the past few months and have become enamored with your imagination and elegant words. This site has been a primary source of help when either My slave or Myself have had doubts, so bounteous amounts of thanks and roses for a job magnificently done.

I can relate to Goodgirl-BadGirl’s comment. It is very nearly, if not completely, how I used to feel. I never understood why I felt this then-frightening urge to hurt others, to beat them and drown in their luscious screams at the confused-budding age of 13. Mind you I had always been a ‘submissive’ child. I would have never thought I’d be the dominant in any relationship, let alone a Mistress.. and yet here I am. Very content, if I might add, ^_^. But, as always, I digress.

To Ms. GoodGirl-BadGirl: as Richard said, there are more of us out there. And yes those feelings you are having may seem odd, cause fear, maybe even get to the point where you think you are a murderer or just plain insane (I know that’s how I felt for a few years). Let it grow, experiment, EXPERIENCE… See if it is really a part of you. And accept it because it is beautiful, and one day you will find your subby prince who will adore you and every cruel lashing you inflict. Good luck my fellow FemDom, smiles.

To Richard: (terribly sorry about this insufferably long comment, but I apparently have a lot to get off my chest, lol), My ideal slave is very nearly what Ms. Morgane had described. Intelligent, must have a sense of humor, genuine need to serve and submit, humble and slightly romantic. My pet has a bit of a smart-ass streak, but one of the many things I love about him, and more reason to smack him around for a while, ^_^. he doesn’t mind of course. Part of Me thinks he does it on purpose, the little pain slut. Ahhh, the delightful inner workings of a submissive mind.

Thank you again for taking time and reading My excruciatingly long comment. I will peruse some more and leave (hopefully smaller) comments, :). Wishing you peace and wellness.

Sincerely,

~A.

Algolagnia,

I like long comments. Thanks for yours.