What if She Tried to Commit Suicide?

I’ve been here longer than you. And Aspirant preceded me. He’s a fine and honorable man who has so often striven to offer reverence and love. They’ve had so many setbacks. And then came the night she tried to murder herself. How profound this gentle and adoring man’s pain must be:

… For the most part I live by her rules, and I serve her as best I can, but it feels like I serve into a vacuum. I cannot tell if what I do touches her. I feel no dominance from her, and I think it may be that way for some time to come.

…

I almost lost a loved one, and grieve for her though she is still with me, and I find that confusing. But there is more. My dear loved one is still with me, but my Master is gone, and I am finding that so very, very difficult to cope with.

Struggling