A Gentle Domme
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We guys want dominant women to be fierce and scary don’t we? Well sometimes.
Do you ever picture her as having a sense of humor? And I do mean aside from acid sarcasm and an arctic smile.
How about a self-described “goofy” Domme? Why not?
Supposedly our pleasure is her pleasure. Really the pleasure is mutual in each having found someone who is fun to be with. Though one may hope that includes being led by a cock leash and that her aim with a cane is true.
I’ve discovered a blog by a smart, likeable Latina Domina (sounds like a Prince song):
Yes, I am often goofy. From my first SM relationship and probably to my last. I have a silly sense of humor. It’s who I am. But I resemble the fact (ha ha!) that she questions how my partners can take me seriously. Life is too short to always have a stick up your ass. Literally and figuratively. I like playtime to be exactly that, playtime. Why would I put any sort of work into a relationship if I cannot be myself in it? And today, as it has always been, I am a silly sort.
She had a few kind words about me. I must demur at one of her conjectures.
Well, he’d likely have slightly less desire to engage in S&M sessions.
I doubt I’d ever meet someone whose desire for S&M play exceeds my own. There’s a reason Alexandra called me a “maso-whore.”
Gentle Depraved Soul: Tales from a Domme
Comments
I have been online in spurts the past few weeks so I had not yet had the chance to review such posts. Thank you so much for your kind words…
However, I should probably clarify the title “Goofy Domme.” I meant the phrase as a reference to a friend’s pervious statements about my nature. Her issue with me was the fact that I have not been taking my role as a dominant all-powerful uber-bitch as seriously as I used to. But I think most of my friend’s, and indeed many of my new potential toy’s, issues with me stem from the fact that for every 20 beautiful cruel acts I perpetuate, I also commit one completely silly one… like shoving a bouquet of daisies in my toy’s behind, snapping a photo, and then placing said photo on my desk labeled “Good morning, Starshine.”
I think it comes from my young age and the fact that I come from the MTV generation where people like me have the attention spans of gnats. One of the best ways to get my attention (besides being tall, intelligent, and fairly well-hung) is to be humorous. Yes, I get the whole serious whip-totting persona. Been there, done that. And like I said in previous posts on my blog, I take my desires very seriously. I simply don’t take my nature too seriously lest I fall head-first out of Domme space… laughing and clutching my chest at some of the turn-ons of my submissives.
Oh, and it could also be that I’m being a bit nostalgic for the toys from when I first got into the BDSM scene in my teens. Teen submissives are so much easier to shape and tend to have wacky senses of humor that get me totally hot. Alas, I have always been interested in men my own age and now I’m in my early 20s… and it’s like all potential partners have gotten serious and boring.
Tis all.
Posted by: GDS | October 29, 2005 3:17 PM
Überbitches have certainly been a part of my fantasy life. And it always thrills me when Alexandra is demanding and cruel. But I like it when she’s gentle and the various points in-between.
What you say sounds perfectly sane to me (though flowers up the butt would be very humiliating). I can’t imagine life being worth living without laughter. Or a better way to bond, if only as part of the spectrum of intereaction.
Matisse has said a couple of times that when she’s with “Roman” it is anarchic S&M and that they laugh a lot. She’s as qualified as anybody to know what a Domme “should” be.
It can be hard for those of us who enjoy surrendering to sometimes not get too serious about our needs. Possibly the biggest stress I’ve given Alexandra.
That I chose “goofy” was partly be looking for a hook for the entry. It was an interesting and challenging image.
Best regards.
Posted by: Richard | October 29, 2005 4:48 PM
Finally, someone who understands! This upsets me even more because now I know that there ARE people like me out there. Just not living close to my who are also my age. Damn.
Posted by: GDS | October 31, 2005 2:45 PM
Aside from our age gap Alexandra lives on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean. The latter brings much frustration to our lives but we both feel it is better to get what we can than have nothing.
I’m sure you’ll eventually find the right guy(s).
It is always a problem of geography and time. I know you are about to move (postgraduate education?).
Hopefully you’ll wind up where there are good much groups or the right kind of guys on who are on CollarMe/CollarChat.
I have sometimes wondered if having to weed out so much chaff – e.g., the “needy” guys who really only want some specific fetish scratched – doesn’t leave some dominant women in danger of becoming too cynical about finding suitable partners.
Very best wishes.
Posted by: Richard | October 31, 2005 3:04 PM