Wherefore Woman Rules Roost?

Hi Richard,

I think the explanation that Candace was just performing academic (or personal) research by taking on an online persona is the one that fits the facts. If she was hacked or hijacked, she would have complained to blogspot and gotten the blog re-instated.

I don’t really think the explanation of her being tired of dealing with critical comments hold water; she was almost universally getting fawning adulation. Her abandoned blog coincides with an external real-life event; the blog was no longer needed. She had what she needed and there was no need to continue.

I enjoyed some of her writing, but I quickly tired of her mostly vanilla orientation.

Best regards, Thomas

My understanding is that she cancelled the blog and the URL was taken over by people who watch for those.

From what women tell me fawning comments aren’t nearly as exciting as men expect them to be, especially after you get a bunch of them.

I too had begun to lose interest in her blog for the same reason as you. But that was exactly what made it useful for those who don’t share our strongly kinky nature.

I for one appreciate your comments, Richard.

But I can’t agree that it had anything to do with research. No university in the country respects the use of soft porn as a methodology.

I think its far more likely that, after three months of praising her husband, that they had a hardcore fight which made further outside discourse on the subject seem gauche to them.

As you said. Tired of putting up with the world.

Thank You, Richard, for informing me of what happened to her blog. I hadn’t had time to read much of it, and this morning went to look for it, and poof, it was gone.

I will check the links you provide for other blogs to find some written from the Female Dominant’s pov.

Hello Richard

When I discovered “Woman rules roost” I was very charmed. My beloved and I -just about the same time Candace started her blog- expanded her authority and for us it was very recognizable as we were going true the same phases. Because of her I started my own blog. I was a bit envious of all the discussions about the subject going on there. It IS very interesting to read the writtings of females, males. Dommes and subs all engaged on different levels of D/s. It would make a great study but I dont believe that theorie. Anyway, there is nothing like it in my own language so I just want to say to all of you that your writting are of influence (even the fake ones) and I want to thank you all for that.

Candace resurfaced on the FLR forum to settle things:

I got to the point where I was feeling compelled to post something to the blog every day, whether time permitted it or not. It was not for lack of anything to write about, as this journey provides me with the most interesting experiences, and the feedback to the postings were of great value to me in understanding my journey and suggesting new experiences Tom and I may want to try. Rather, the postings were becoming an end to themselves rather than a way to communicate and integrate the facts and emotions of the female led lifestyle. As I can be a rather decisive woman, I chose to eliminate this source of conflict from my life in one fell swoop, erasing the blog entirely so as not to be tempted to go back. I didn’t see any value in keeping stale postings on the internet.

This was definitely an act I did with little thought, though I do not regret doing it. My life is now simpler and I have one less thing hanging over my head.

With regards to the “nemesis blogger”, suffice it to say that he was in no way responsible for chasing me away. I found him to be rather pompous, and I have my doubts as to the veracity of his writing. But this is something I shall never know, and so I don’t spend any time worrying about it, or him. But his speculation that I was a poseur doing research for my graduate work is beyond preposterous.

I for one enjoyed her blog. I put it in the same category of “textual integrity” as Elise Sutton’s Female Superiority page or Emily Addison’s Around Her Finger page. I completely understand how Candace was overwhelmed by the need to keep it updated. I assume that Elise and Emily make no to very little money on their sites/updates (call them blogs), but they continue to work them every month for the years that they have been posting. Candace was trying to do it daily… it is just not sustainable. I agree, however, I wish she had left the old posts up. Even Lady Katherine (who I understand has started posting again) kept her posts up after she went MIA for months.

i enjoyed candice’s blog very much, a window into LFA. I was getting around to showing it to my wife, to bring up the subject. I think her blog would have a better chance of getting my wife to consider this life style than the Sutton or around my finger sites. So i really am sad it was deleted. I think it was sufficient even if she posted to it only monthly. It should be a lesson as to how precious the internet can be, but also how fragile and fleeting it can be also.

Hi there Richard. We are new in this whole Dom/sub game. My husband has admited he likes our bondage games, and would like to take it further, and explore his submissive side more (or more to the point, he wishes me to be more Dom) I have begun the search, trying to find out what a Dom woman is….(without alot of sucsess so far!!) and I read with interest, your knowledge on these blogs. Was perhaps hoping you might be able to steer me/us in the right direction?? We are not after hearing about the extremes, but would love to read more about other couples, just begining their journey (Books, blogs, websites ect ect!!)

Thanks for your time, you have my email addy, Im happy if it is published, anything to help me on my hunt for knowledge.

Kaz

A dominant woman may be many things: especially in a loving relationship or marriage. Usually whatever works best to make the two people happy. Never let anyone convince you there is one true way.

And there may be different styles of play at different times depending on what you both enjoy: she can be tender, stern even cruel all within the same relationship. But – again – only if all of those modes worth for them.

Given time and experience you’ll probably see changes in how you do things. Just as you would with anything else you are learning about and exploring.

Books: I’d suggest both The New Topping Book and The New Bottoming Book. Both from Greenery Press and most any Greenery Press book is worth looking at.

Karen & Bob- It may help to sit and have an honest talk about where you both want this to go. What do you want from it, what does he want from it? Another option would be for Bob write a short story about a fictional couple; this would serve as a way to get into his head a little more. There are many different types of dominance, so it’s important to find a way that works for both of you. Don’t worry about following someone else’s standard of what a “real” domme or sub is; do what works for both of you. That’s what matters. Be sure to keep up on the communication throughout this exploration. Yes, I know this is unsolicited advice on my part, but I felt compelled to write this anyway.

Karen & Bob - in addition to the Topping/Bottoming books from Greenery Press, take a look at The Sexually Dominant Woman: A Workbook for Nervous Beginners. Likewise, The Mistress Manual.

You may also consider: http://www.amityworld.com/forwomen.html and http://www.akashaweb.com/women/index.html (the latter being a Pay site). Both are excellent resouces for beginners.

Tom Allen The Edge of Vanilla