Clothespins (The Long Night)

That night Alexandra slapped my nipples with her riding crop before putting three clothespins on each nipple.

She surprised me by clipping them to my ears and putting them up my nose making me look like a fool. Having clothespins stuck in your nose doesn't hurt but is uncomfortable and hindering (she took them off when I was unable to kiss her toes with them in).

I was thrilled that she wanted to make me look stupid. My own imagination had never risen above having "slave" written across my forehead in lipstick.

Is the desire to be humiliated the emotional side of masochism?

While I guess it is really strength but when on my knees it feels like more of a weakness that I can't imagine being easily humiliated.

What humiliates me? Being spat on, having my face slapped. Especially the latter, not sure why.

Oddly I'm not sure that being urinated on would. Possibly because I know people who do it as vanilla fun. Then again it has never happened to me. But if you add something like mud, or if I think of it happening repeatedly and left on for a (seemingly) long time it becomes humiliating.

Being treated as pet has always sounded humiliating: forced to eat from a bowl, or sit up with your arms raised panting (begging) for a doggie treat you don't really want. Being forced to lap up piss from a saucer. Or my most icky pet fantasy: eating dry pet food that has been pissed on.

I guess I need degradation, maybe very strong degradation to feel really humiliated.

Bondage is humiliating but I want to write about that later.

As was the last time the most moving moment with the clothespins was when she knocked them off. That is when they cause the most pain.