Not Always On My Knees

I skim through D/s weblogs. Not as much as I used to. Mostly because there are so few that share F/m romance and sexuality.

Though too often you folks don’t say much about that. I’m not complaining. Wish you would.

Then it hit me. One thing that distinguishes this weblog from some others is it focuses only on my D/s relationship. The others are about life in general with female dominance appearing occasionally.

As at least a couple of you have cannily discovered I have many weblogs, many websites. This is solely devoted to the romantic D/s I’m lucky enough to have with Alexandra.

It may surprise some of you that I don’t think about dominance and submission most of the time. Life has many other needs and requirements.

Especially right now. When my libido flags, as it unkindly does at times, I lose my connection not just to my penis but also the joys of masochism and surrender.

Spooks me a bit. It as if something has been taken away from me. Suddenly I look at my desires with puzzlement. Only a little, I miss feeling them.

Makes me worry that she’ll need for me to become her slave and while I will comply my heart won’t be fully in it. She has a discerning eye for the depth and quality of my surrender however much I try to offer a simulacrum. I think that was a problem only once.

And one of the pleasures of our mutual exploration is that she has gained increasing insight into how to bring forth in me what she requires.

Really I can’t imagine a time when I wouldn’t happily lick her boots. Of course in that I’m indulging my own hunger, which isn’t the same thing as surrender.

I’ve gotten sidetracked.

What I wanted to explain is that as much as I enjoy her taking me as her slave the thoughts that first come to my mind when I think of her return are often of other things.

Nibbling her earlobe, digging my tongue into her belly button.

I’m so very lucky to have found someone with whom I can share a full spectrum of experiences.