The Root of Too Much Evil

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I’m waiting delivery of replacements (second hand) of the couch and futon. So nice to have always known people who are happy to help you. One of those things to take care of before Alexandra is back home with me.

There’s a streak of scruffy boho in me. Had the enthusiasm of my childhood persisted I might have grown into a absented minded scientist like those popular in movieland. One of my faults is that like the grasshopper of fable I’ve never laid provision for the morrow. Less fancifully for too long I played the irresponsible youth who had no plans of growing up.

So I never prepared for the ravages of relationships, unkindness of socioeconomic trends, the plain cool indifference of reality to my fate.

Plainly: for the last couple of years I’ve been fighting off penury. With a financial back flip here and cunning two-step there I’ve kept myself out of the gutter. Admittedly my own small improvidences keep things greased and my gyrations sometimes leaving flat on my face.

Thankfully my slim mastery of the science of applied luck works small monthly miracles. Though I dread the IRS’ response to my under withholding on my tax payments. As much as I hate parting with my collection of early romance comics (!) hopefully that will give me an offering with which to offset their wrath.

Sheer money fear interfered greatly with my time with Alexandra last year. It got worse once she was back in England. I’d lie awake at night worrying. Pity worries aren’t legal tender.

With my beloved’s return my real resolve is to put the paranoia aside. To work that mental magic that keeps the heart’s inner eye focused on the happiness of again being with her.

I am a bit miffed that mere money will stop of from doing some things. I have so badly wanted for her to cage me. A more binding chastity device. Etc.

BDSM isn’t the toys. But the toys are lots of fun.

Ah, the quotidian cares can be such deadly enemies.

Wish me the power to keep my resolve for the three months we’ll have together.

Comments

I feel similarly inguriated at the state of the world and the unfairness of money’s importance. There’s little I feel that I can do about that, though.

Richard, someone great once told me, and I have to remind myself often: “You are not the sum total of your debts”. Also, the root of evil is the love of money; not the money. Don’t forget that or the money won’t like you. ;)
No, you, and Alexandra, are richly blessed in ways money can never buy. I consume your blogs voraciously and as someone often overcoming budget woes, had to say, chin up! Think creatively. I’ve found lots of toy making resources online for doing it on the cheap, and surely you have seen thefrugaldomme.com. Don’t forget the free section of certain local list sites for random BDSM goodness, among other things. Make a game of how frugal you can be- make sure to laugh at people who do things like pay for frozen pre-made PB&J sandwiches as often as possible; that helps a lot. From one grasshopper to another, I’d be happy to share my ‘pantry panic’ dinner recipes for 2 with you lovebirds if it helps :)

I can’t help but snicker when I see precooked mashed potatoes and all the awful instantized food like products.

I do appreciate the value of simple things like wooden spoons and fly swatters. There are just a few things - a bit beyond DIY - that Alexandra and I would like to have … But you’ve got to be realistic.

Of course her love is beyond price and ultimately all I really need.

Thanks!

Yes, I saw a woman pay 2.99 for a container of -it had to be only one- sliced onion. I made a whole meal for the same price, onion included.

I know, there’s nothing quite like a real set of bars between you and the world. You might call the local animal shelters asking if they have resources for low cost kennel supplies for your visiting friend’s very big dog. :D

I found myself wishing yesterday that I was a fly on the wall on the 19th at your local airport- saw your pics on A’s blog and thought how sweet you two will look reuniting. I unite with my long distance slave on the 15th, so it’s nice to know how you two have made that work, kudos and cheers!

Right now it looks like a dog cage on Amazon is the cheapest option. (Even a wooden cage would cost more given hurricanes effect on wood prices.)

Hopefully a year or so from now I’ll finally have managed to put myself back on my feet financially.

My real concern is to not let myself fall into a funk over money. That really took something out of our last time together: an awful waste.

Warmest wishes for you on the 15th.

Yes, I understand all too well. Come up with a few things ahead of time to think of or do when that pit-in-the-stomach feeling comes over you. Make a silly face in the mirror, take a short walk. When it does really get to me, I take a big piece of paper- unfolded- and throw it like it’s a missile, as hard as I can. When it see-saws back to the ground just an inch from my hand in defiance, I usually see how silly it is to let money woes (or anger, whatever) get the best of me. Or at least I just feel pretty silly and then that works.

My what a remarkably sane person you are.

I think I’m going to be so happy to have Alexandra back that nothing will be able to depress me.

Your feelings?

Please share your feelings about The Root of Too Much Evil. Please stick to the topic of the entry. Forthright disagreement is fine as long as it is civil.
My thanks,
Richard


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