The Problem of Romantic Monogamy
» Polyamory Considered
OK, my prior entry documented how I can imagine engaging in BDSM in a fairly impersonal way. So how can I have a problem with poly?
As a young man I had sex with guys about whom all I knew was that they were comely and liked my “steely blue eyes.”
Before I hit my mid-twenties I succumbed to the lure of romance. Actually I started making that mistake at eighteen but it didn’t take control of me for a few years. Long before now I’ve often felt frustrated with that part of myself.
It was always exceedingly rare for me to bond with people on any intimate level. So what was I expecting with the hearts and flowers nonsense? I’ve already explained all that.
My relationship with Alexandra started out in the context of romantic monogamy. Otherwise it would’ve never begun at all. I don’t know how to experience those emotions otherwise.
The question facing me now is if I can imagine romance afresh without the exclusivity that has always been a given for me.
