Her Bored Slave

» Prior Relationship

Alexandra asks, What does it mean for a slave to be bored?

I found myself feeling bored by at least one thing we did.

If you are living in the Femdom Amusement Park you may be wondering “How dare he?”

No one, whatever their sexuality or romantic orientation ever wants to be bored. Much less by something that gives the one they love pleasure.

My own feelings are a mixed muddle.

Face smothering, woman sits on man's face.

On the night that comes to my mind I was acting as her footstool. I was living a long held fantasy.

Recriminating myself is useless. But I wonder two things: 1) How should boredom fit into D/s as we do it; 2) What - if anything - can I do to overcome it.

If you are a masochist or submissive person then you know how you’d feel if being tormented by or serving the woman you worship left her indifferent. Where would be your joy in surrendering to her? Naturally a Domina will feel a loss if her desires don’t evoke the appropriate response in her slave.

When I’ve contemplated boredom in my fantasy life I’ve mostly thought of becoming bored because I’ve been seemingly forgotten or neglected. Locked in a cage, left to sleep outside or on the bathroom floor: being treated as something so unimportant would be converted into satisfaction. Given enough duration.

Deciding to reach outside of myself on BDSM forums and usenet I asked for suggestions. And got a fair number of replies.

One fellow pointed out that boredom is punishment. True, that was one of my suggestions when I wrote about punishing a masochist. And when Alexandra created protocols being locked in the closet was one of the punishments.

While serving as her footstool could be a punishment my goal is to discover within myself pleasure in serving her that way. I want to give her more than mere compliance.

A Domme suggested putting it at the beginning of play or between more intense acts. An interesting idea, particularly putting it at the beginning. But limiting when it might be done is still short of my goal.

Another guy thought that stiletto heels might help. He had no way of knowing how much I adore whatever she has on her feet.

And the suggestion of being whacked with something didn’t sound really workable. Leaning back with your legs on your footstool doesn’t leave you in a comfortable position to slap it with anything. Not that I wouldn’t have liked to come up with another reason for her to give my testicles a thwack.

Most interesting was the idea of self-hypnosis. Mental imagery, autosuggestion: those seem worthwhile skills in themselves. Perhaps for coping with similar difficulties. Actual self-hypnosis isn’t something I imagine I’m capable. But working on some system of reinforcements sounds very worthwhile. (Which is why things like training, discipline and protocols interest me: the pleasure of being aligned to her desires and sinking more deeply into my slavish side.)

He also mentioned yoga. I’ll just quote what he said:

Oh, and a tip for remaining in one position (and now i’m REALLY going to sound like some sort of alternative hippy) - yoga. Can’t say that i go in for all of that plinky plinky music, or the “feel the earth’s energy” stuff, but i can recommend the Child’s pose for the footstool, sort of Cat pose for the side table, but i can’t keep still enough, so i’m soon put in the Hare’s pose for punishment, or better yet, the Downward Facing Dog.

Well, Alexandra did express a desire for me to do yoga.

Recently with Alexandra’s entries, comments on my writings and our online chats I’m feeling ever more in harmony with her. So my boredom may prove self-correcting. After all she’d only told me to perform an act of which I’d often dreamed.

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Comments

In a word, WOW! Can’t wait to digest the rest of this.

I like the idea of audio suggestion loops, and being a sound expert I have the tools to create brainwave synchronizing pink noise and mix it in. Maybe we can experiment with near-subliminal messages too, or is that getting a bit too The Prisoner?

Bondage is another thing to try. I feel more keen than ever about that right now (though rope still sounds the sexiest).

I think I am certainly right in that we need to find a way to get a decent bit of furniture out of you. You can let me know if at any stage you decide you want to cross it off our list of ambitions.

Also, yoga, possibly. Actually as a lover it would mean a lot to me if you did it with me. Not just because it’s a very sensual practice, but also because of the health and sexual benefits.

Love you xxx

I think the idea of repetitive audio suggestion is worth exploring.

Playing with subliminal effects is fine: I trust you, am confident in me there’d be no danger.

Well, you know what a slut for bondage I am. We probably need to spend some time outside D/s trying the rope to get it down properly.

I can’t argue with Yoga when you use a word like “sensual” now can I?

No ;)

I’ve seen the yoga positions for couples and it’s a very beautiful thing. Your bodies and breathing and hence mind become synchronized. It seems a crying shame to waste that on a stranger!

Hi. As I’ve said in a posting elsewhere on thsi site recently I love using my slaves as footstools and am really pleased to have an opportunity to read and talk about it openly.

The problem of the boredom of the slave - allied to the physical difficulty of maintaining the position - is one I am very familiar with. I think the way I have come to see it is that the footstool position is in itself a punishment, not a treat for the slave. It may well turn them on - but that in itself is a punishment if they are not allowed to touch themselves or otherwise do anything about it. Thus the boredom is part of the punishment too.

But to alleviate the boredom I agree it is sometimes worthwhile giving them something to do while they are crouching there! The most effective I have used is giving them some sort of written work to do. with hundreds of lines, (‘I must not disobey my Master’) or perhaps a nice submissive long letter of apology, which I can read after I have got bored with being in that position and want to do something else. :=)

Best wishes! FB, Edinburgh, UK

Restriction and boredom is the answer to that old question: how do you punish a masochist. And that might become how it is used. Her call.

But for now my goal is to try to enjoy it as submission. That is what would give her the most pleasure. We both know that maybe I won’t be able to but I need to try.

Given that it has long been one of my fantasies and the strong erotic connection I have for her feet and what she puts on them I’m surprised it didn’t work out.

Good to hear from you again.

Your feelings?

Please share your feelings about Her Bored Slave. Please stick to the topic of the entry. Forthright disagreement is fine as long as it is civil.
My thanks,
Richard


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