Depending on what the word training suggests to you in a D/s context it can seem a deepening power exchange or completely kooky if not dangerous. I confess that ritual and protocol has a potent attraction for me.
Hoping to oblige a request I’ve put together a collection of the sites I remember looking at when meditating on training and protocol. This isn’t an endorsement of any of them.
Gloria Brame was a key part of my early BDSM self-education. I didn’t see anything on the topic of training on Gloria’s site but there is an interesting series of essays, Perspectives of a Male Submissive:
More and more i hear experienced Dominants questioning their capability and willingness to take on the teaching and training of a new submissive. One reason being that many are beginning to question their ability to distinguish submissives who are truly interested in learning, driven by their recognition of their very strong inner desire to serve, from those who are interested only in learning enough to appear serious and well trained as a means of merely finding an occasional play partner.
This is the only commercial link. Ms. Christine’s mailing list is a place where I learned about the variety of D/s.
The Fem Dom Manuals were originally written in 1986. They came about because at that time I had been living with David for some seven years. … I decided that what I had learned about David and other submissives in those seven years could well benefit other couples who come together to form either temporary or permanent dom-sub relationships.
Quite a long list, I imagine most people pick and choose among them. If they even really read the whole thing.
The following 128 rules are written in the context of a M/s (Master/slave) relationship, but could be used by those in a D/s (Dominant/submissive) relationship, and provide a good project for those submissive/slave males to adapt them towards their relationship with their Dominatrix/Mistress, respectively (double meaning intended).
A look at setting rules for a slave’s sleeping: where and in what position.
A M/f site with several essays on training. Including the risky concept of re-socialization.
B.E.S.T. slave training considers consensual slave training as a re-education and re-socialization process. A Master establishes the goals during training and then provides the motivation necessary to complete them. Encouragement is usually the best motivator.
Jack Rinella is a long writer on leathersex with several books to his credit. This page links to a variety of essays. Those on contracts and expectations may be useful to someone who is thinking of a formal slave training regimen.
Gore is M/f but the postures can be adapted by anybody wanting to use ritual as a form of training.
The Dog House is an M/m site with a focus on the male slave as pet.
This page is aimed at the care and training of the male slave. The development of the slave is a special process, seeing him grow and move towards is rebirth as a pure slave. Components of this can be use for recreational slavery - that is not living the SM life style but treating is as sport.
Internal Enslavement is written in an M/f context but most of the ideas can be adapted without regard to gender. Very potent stuff, some may find it spooky. The site is maintained by Tano who also maintains The Slave Register.
F.R.R. Mallory’s site Steele Door has a collection of often remarkably good essays on BDSM. The concept of training is slippery and like anything be taken in dangerous directions.
It has become common to use the concept of ‘training’ as a means of applying often severe ‘acceptable’ diminishment of the individual in order to ‘help’ the individual toward some elusive ideal of the ‘perfect submissive’. This ‘training’ is also used to forcibly control the actions and behaviors of the individual being so ‘trained’. The ‘trainer’ by eliciting ‘pre-consent’ to the actions of training attains ‘permission’ to violate the character, belief in self, ethics, moral structure and personal integrity of the individual. In this way the issue of consent is ‘attended’ to and the submissive is placed in a position of being responsible for or agreeing to the actions taken against them. …
… If you put five Dominants in a room each one of them will like something different. …
Back in July I wrote: The power of protocols, rituals, rules and ceremonies.
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