Beautiful Suffering

My research has brought me to much the same idea, supported by writers like Vern Bullough and Anita Phillips. BDSM is not religious, but it does speak to certain human desires which were once fulfilled through religious rituals: flagellation, asceticism, etc.

I’m an atheist but in reading accounts of the early Christian martyrs they often responded to their torture cheerfully or ecstatically.

I’ve also had a faint feeling that something might be derived from liturgy but never managed to come up with anything concrete.

To write toward ‘Beautiful Suffering’ I would add my own experience. The savage sadist in me is ignited by the first bead of sweat that emerges from my pet (usually on his perfectly chiseled face) it develops into a small droplett falling across his temple, telling me his anticipation grows. My fire is fueled even further upon observing real apprehension reflected in his expression. My pet has the most delicious blue eyes that I can swim across the English Channel in, but when he is anticipating the unknown -helplessly, bare, vulnerable and raw, I can nagivate the Atlantic Ocean.

To be worshipped by this man causes me to fly, walk on water, (any cliche applies here) - I wonder sometimes that he has no idea the depth of his suffering elevates the seduction. His submission is so selfless, so pure - yet he is bound in his own web of ecstasy while I revel at his journey into surrender.

Thank you for maintaining this site. It is sheer joy and I thank you from the top of my heart. :)

That is what those of us who need to surrender hope is in the hearts of the women we worship. To know the joy they feel in taking from us what they can. It is our reward and a very real reward.

We need to be aware that there are people who feel uneasy about using that vocabulary in D/s. It sounds sacrilegious to some, who cannot quite reconcile both a supernatural deity (or His chosen prophet) and a Domina both being the ultimate superior being, the ultimate power and centre of worship.

The only answer i have been able to invent is to put life into two compartments. One is the “real” world (which may be a spiritual or supernatural one, but let’s pass for now on the definition of “real”). The other is the D/s world, where different rules of physics and power sharing apply.

You may have to say that this second world (“Second LIfe”?) is a game; that’s okay. Compare it to a tennis game, for example: on the court, you do everything the rules allow to beat your opponent, while off the court you are the best of friends and would give the shirt off your back to help in a “real” emergency. You have to turn on and off the magic glasses, so to speak.

This can mean a “normal” household where you raise the children, drop in on the neighbor’s barbecue, and all that. Then, either alone or in the company of similar-minded folk, you transform into the D/s personalities. As in tennis, there may be rules: no fatalities, no severe injuries, certain time and space limits, etc. Play the game by the rules, and you can enjoy it for a lifetime.